So recently I’ve noticed a trend which I know has been around for a long time but in recent days and weeks, I’ve seen it more. Shaming people for being themselves. Most recently I have witnessed woman shaming among other types but this was super recent.
So the story: A picture or status would pop up on a mutual friends social media and some of us comment on it and we will be banter and argue and sometimes it does get heated. But in the past we have all said our opposite opinions made for good discussions and we respected each other. We all need a good discussion based on our views. And it’s great to share our differences and a little heat in the conversation is always welcome but when it starts to catch on fire it’s time to put it away . Anyway, I’ve noticed not just with me but other women are being called “sluts” or even “cunts” and more recently “liberal/feminist cunt or slut”. We are told to be quiet because we are women. And the worst part is not just being called such names but after the conversation has ended a day or two later this person will come back and keep name-calling. And if we continue spouting our opinions we are then called a “feminist ____” immediately followed with some more derogatory words. Why should I have slanderous words flown at me because I have an opinion just like somebody else does?
Slut. Bitch. Whore. These are the words that stick to us and stick inside us, in our guts and dig at our confidence. My opinion is worth just as much as yours and vice versa. When people say horrendous things and spout them as facts you then know there is nothing you can say that will get through to them even just being pleasant to each other. Even showing statistical data suddenly “the government is going into the internet and changing all the information to suit their needs”. I was shamed a few weeks ago when some women came to our house to discuss their views on their religion. When told we do not practice that religion they then said everyone makes mistakes. You can share your views and we can discuss the differences and what we believe in, but don’t tell me I made a “mistake” because I believe or don’t in something. Women vs women in the name calling department is awful. We should be able to have our own differences but unite based on the fact that we share many things together and embrace our differences. But when you hear such disrespectful talk coming out of a man’s mouth, that goes even beyond machismo and mansplaning…it is frightening. Sure they are only words and that is true, but our history shows that entire nations can be moved by what comes out of even one person’s mouth. Verbal threats can drive-through a woman just as badly as a fist through a wall. It’s more than just feminism or a so-called liberal point of view, it’s speaking with such disgust and hatred that it just drips out of your mouth with toxic distain. Of course you have freedom of speech to back you up and if that’s how you really feel about the people around you whether women, men, or whomever you speak of then it is of course your right. But then don’t become aghast when people fight against it or have equally strong opinions that you say “do not count”. If you choose to accost people with your words then be ready to have those same people defend themselves.
I am OVER the slut shaming. The woman shaming. The “I have a vagina” shaming. Religion shaming. In a recent social media conversation displayed, someone said that women invite rape if you drink too much or dress a certain way and it is your fault if you are a victim. Now we are victim shaming women because let’s see… my dress hem might be a little too high?? My lipstick is too red? If you decided to go to a party and drank a little too much and you are assaulted then well…it is your fault because how dare you try to have fun at a party and trust that your life isn’t torn apart by someone who wants to hurt you! I get stay at home mom shaming and when I worked I got shamed into that too. I am told I am lazy for having a chronic disease I can’t help because there are days I can’t do anything more than get up and get dressed. I have witnessed awful comments about people’s sexuality in a negative way if they support someone or something another person does not approve of. There is too much SHAMING and it is EVERYWHERE.
If you must call me a liberal snowflake feminist whore, then go right ahead. I will not let your words show me who I am Or my tribe of women, men, LGTBQ, or ANYONE who is shamed for being who they are. You can have your opinion of me. But you can’t DEFINE me.